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21 Times a Hole-in-One Absolutely Doesn’t Count

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Holes-in-one, whether you’ve had a bunch of them or are still chasing that elusive first (like our resident writer Alan Shipnuck) are great fun. It’s part of the fabric of golf; something we all strive for. So much so that we’ll even bend the rules ever-so-slightly in pursuit of one. But I’m sorry, that stuff won’t fly around these parts.
 
Holes-in-one are special because they’re so rare. There aren’t any shortcuts. It’s why I’ve put together this handy list outlining all the times making a hole-in-one absolutely doesn’t count.
 

1. After A Mulligan

Sad, but true. Let’s say you’re playing a par 3, shank one into the water, drop a sneaky mulligan down with the consent of your playing partners, and knock it in the hole. A fun story, no doubt, but it doesn’t count as a hole-in-one. Proper holes-in-one need to have a legitimate, USGA-abiding score attached to them.
 

2. After A Penalty Shot

Similar to the one above, the only difference is that, technically speaking, you do register a score that would hold muster with the USGA. The only problem is that if you knock one in the water, re-tee then knock it into the hole, it can’t be a hole-in-one because it’s literally not a hole-in-one. It’s a hole-in-three. Just another par, in the black and white on the scorecard.
 
It also violates another rule of mine…
 

3. Multiple Attempts On The Same Hole

I love the European Tour’s hole-in-one videos. Love them. But when you have that many attempts with no actual score attached to the end of it, and when you’re standing in front of the golf gods at the pearly gates of golf heaven, this won’t go down as an *actual* hole-in-one.
 

4. On A Par-3 Course

Yes, technically you are playing an actual course and registering a legitimate score, but there’s something about it that doesn’t feel right. True holes-in-one are registered on golf courses where par 3s are few-and-far between.
 

5. Temporary Green

This is a little harsh because there’s not really much the player themselves can do about it, but temporary greens present all kinds of problems. The grass almost never actually resembles that of an actual green, and the holes can often be cut incorrectly. The yardage gets thrown off along the way; not exactly the fairest platform for claiming a hole-in-one.
 

6. In a Golf Simulator

I love golf simulators, and living in New York City, use them all the time to get my golf fix in. I’ve actually made a hole-in-one on a simulator once. Do I go around claiming it as an actual hole-in-one? No, I don’t, because it’s not an actual hole-in-one.
 

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7. Scramble

If there’s a common theme among all these things, it’s that holes in one need to be registered in legitimate, law-abiding rounds that the USGA would approve of counting toward your handicap. A scramble, fun as they are, doesn’t fit that criteria.
 

8. When You Play An Odd Number Of Holes

Play three holes and make a hole in one on one of them? Then play the final six holes to get your nine-hole score. I’m not sure holes-in-one can exist in isolation; they need to be part of a larger round, either 9 or 18.
 

 

9. When Somebody Else Knocks In Your Ball For You

This one should be obvious. You hit your ball on the green, perhaps close to the hole, then your buddy in the group ahead putts your ball into the hole for you. Hilarious! But not an actual hole in one.
 

10. Signing An Incorrect Card

This one is savage, but if you’re playing in a tournament and make a hole-in-one, only for your playing partner to mark it incorrectly on a scorecard you end up signing. Technically speaking — and heartbreakingly so — that’s no longer an official hole-in-one.
 

11. When You’re Not Keeping Score

You’re out there, having fun, playing a casual round and taking a few mulligans along the way. Then, you waltz up to a par 3 and knock it in the hole. It violates my rule of a hole-in-one needing to be a part of a legitimate round.
 
You could go back and count up your score, of course, but that presents a different problem.
 

12. After a Breakfast Ball

Alright, so you’re on the first tee, blow one out of bounds, take a customary breakfast ball and pipe it down the middle. Let’s say that’s your only mulligan of the day. Fast forward a few holes and you make a hole-in-one. This round wouldn’t hold up in a tournament, so does this hole-in-one count? No comment.
 

13. Double Green, Wrong Pin

Can’t make a hole-in-one on a hole that isn’t the one you’re playing. Simple.
 

14. In Front Of Tee Markers

It’s the Rules of Golf. If you tee off from in front of the tee markers, it’s not a legitimate shot. Would take a bold playing partner to call that on you, though.
 

15. Wrong Tee Markers

See above.
 

 

16. Borrowed Club

You grab your buddy’s club and knock it in the hole. Alas, that violates the Rules of Golf. So nice shot! But not a hole in one.
 

17. Bonus Holes

A fair amount of golf courses have bonus holes to help players settle bets, and they’re usually par 3s. Let’s say you’re all-square in a match after 18, so you play a bonus hole and make an ace. Great job, and even better story. But is that an official hole-in-one? Eh.
 

18. Using An Illegal Club

This doesn’t just not count, it’s also cheating. For shame!
 

19. If It’s Embedded Against The Lip

This one’s already been settled. It’s not a hole-in-one, because it’s embedded against the lip.
 

20. Miniature Golf or Video Game Golf

This one should be so obvious I’m not even going to bother explaining why.
 

21. Grounds For Any Other DQ

The common theme here is that true holes-in-one count only during legitimate, complete rounds which could count toward your handicap. We’ve tried outlining some of the most common ones, but wanted to include this catch-all for any others we have have missed.
 
 
By Luke Kerr-Dineen on Golf.com

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These 18 Golf Jokes Are So Funny, Even Your Scorecard Will Laugh!

If your golf game isn’t turning heads for the right reasons, keep your playing partners entertained with these 18 hilarious golf jokes—one for every hole!

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Let’s face it—sometimes, your golf game isn’t exactly Tour-level. And when your drives are slicing into the trees and your putts are missing by a mile, you need a solid backup plan. That’s where humor comes in.

Next time you’re out on the course, distract your playing partners from your less-than-stellar shots with a few well-timed golf jokes. Not only will you lighten the mood, but you might just make them laugh so hard they forget to notice how bad your last swing was.

So, here are 18 hilarious golf jokes, one for each hole. Enjoy—and may your game be better than your punchlines!

Hole 1 – The Warm-Up

🏌️ Why do golfers always carry an extra pair of socks?
Because they might get a hole in one!

Hole 2 – Getting Into the Swing

🏌️ What’s the difference between a bad golfer and a bad skydiver?
A bad golfer goes, “Whack… darn.” A bad skydiver goes, “Darn… whack.”

Hole 3 – The Early Struggles

🏌️ Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants?
In case he got a hole in one… again!

Hole 4 – Time for Some Trash Talk

🏌️ Why did the pro golfer bring string to the course?
To tie the score.

Hole 5 – That First Lost Ball

🏌️ Why did the golfer wear two different shoes?
Because he had a rough time deciding which was the right one.

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PING Hoofer

Hole 6 – The First Bogey of the Day

🏌️ Why don’t golfers ever get locked out of their cars?
Because they always have plenty of “drivers.”

Hole 7 – That One Friend Who Takes Golf Too Seriously

🏌️ Why did the golfer take an extra club to the course?
Because he heard the drinks were on the house.

Hole 8 – Time for a Drink at the Turn

🏌️ What’s a golfer’s favorite type of music?
Swing.

Hole 9 – Mid-Round Meltdown

🏌️ Why did the golfer bring a ladder?
Because he heard the course was on another level!

Hole 10 – Starting the Back Nine Strong

🏌️ Why did the golfer bring a light bulb to the course?
Because he wanted to brighten up his scorecard.

Hole 11 – Watching Someone Miss an Easy Putt

🏌️ Why did the golfer put his money in the fridge?
Because he wanted cold, hard cash for the skins game.

Hole 12 – That One Friend Who’s Always Complaining

🏌️ Why did the golfer bring sunscreen?
Because he didn’t want to get burned on the scorecard.

Hole 13 – When Your Friend Thinks They’re Better Than They Are

🏌️ What’s the difference between a golfer and a fisherman?
A golfer lies about how many strokes he took, a fisherman lies about how big his catch was.

Hole 14 – Golf Etiquette 101

🏌️ Why do golfers always tell the truth?
Because they can’t handle any more penalties.

Hole 15 – The Last-Ditch Effort to Save Your Score

🏌️ Why do golfers love donuts?
Because they’re always working on their “hole” game.

Hole 16 – The Final Stretch

🏌️ Why did the golfer get kicked out of the party?
Because he kept trying to address the ball.

Hole 17 – When Everyone’s Feeling Good

🏌️ What do you call a golfer who always gets a par?
A liar.

Hole 18 – Wrapping It Up in Style

🏌️ Why did the golfer bring an umbrella?
Because he heard there was a chance of showers on the scorecard.

If your golf game isn’t making people smile, at least your jokes can. Keep a few of these in your bag, and even if your drives aren’t straight, your humor will be right on target.

Now go out there, crack a joke, and enjoy the game—because at the end of the day, golf is supposed to be fun! 🏌️‍♂️🤣

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5 Pristine Public Courses To Start Your Florida Tour!

Warm up on these pristine public courses in the Sunshine State.

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Florida is a favorite among golf lovers with 1,154 courses and 101 sunny days each year. The state also boasts the most rounds played, the most new courses opened, and the most courses under construction or in planning.

Several of its major cities offer top-notch golf experiences. Here’s a breakdown of some of the best public golf courses in Florida:

Orlando

Orange County National Golf Center
Features two championship courses, Panther Lake and Crooked Cat, and a 9-hole short course called “The Tooth.” Renowned for its exceptional practice facilities and hosting the PGA Merchandise Show Demo Day.

Tampa

Copperhead Course at Innisbrook Golf Resort
This Larry Packard-designed course is a favorite among PGA Tour players, known for its challenging layout and natural beauty. It hosts the Valspar Championship annually.

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Naples

Old Corkscrew Golf Club
A Jack Nicklaus-designed championship course, it offers a scenic and challenging experience with firm greens and abundant wildlife. It consistently ranks among Florida’s top public courses.

Miami

Crandon Golf at Key Biscayne: Located just 10 minutes from downtown Miami, this unique public course offers stunning views of Biscayne Bay and the Atlantic Ocean. It features challenging bunkering, mangrove thickets, and seven saltwater lakes.

Port St. Lucie

PGA Golf Club: Located in Port St. Lucie, about an hour north of West Palm Beach, this club offers three distinct 18-hole courses: the Dye, Ryder, and Wanamaker. It will host the 2025 PGA Professional Championship.

Why Play Florida?

Diverse and Exceptional Courses

Iconic Venues: Florida boasts several legendary golf courses that offer unforgettable experiences:

    Unique Course Characteristics

    Varied Landscapes: Florida golf courses offer remarkable diversity:

    • Links-style experiences
    • Coastal views with ocean breezes
    • Courses with dramatic elevation changes
    • Layouts featuring water hazards, strategic bunkers, and challenging greens

    World-Class Amenities

    Most top Florida courses provide:

    • Luxury resort accommodations
    • Professional-level practice facilities
    • Top-tier caddies and service
    • Stunning natural scenery

    Pro Tip: Bring your best game and be prepared for challenging, memorable golf experiences across Florida’s diverse courses.

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    Winter is Ruining Your Golf Game—Here’s How to Survive Until Spring

    Surviving the Brutal Wait for Spring’s Glorious Return

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    Ah, winter—a time of holiday cheer, cozy sweaters, and absolute, soul-crushing misery for golfers everywhere. As the latest round of winter storms batter the U.S., dumping snow where we don’t want it (on our fairways) and ice where we don’t need it (on our driveways), we golfers find ourselves trapped in a seasonal purgatory, longing for the smell of freshly cut grass and the sweet, soul-redeeming sound of a well-struck 7-iron.

    If you’re like me, you’ve started to wonder: Is spring ever coming? Or is golf now just a distant memory, a sport we once played before Mother Nature decided we needed an extended lesson in patience?

    The 5 Stages of Golf Winter Withdrawal

    1. Denial: “It’s fine. Winter won’t last that long. I’ll be back on the course in no time.”
    2. Anger: “WHY do I live in a place where my driver spends more time in the garage than in my hands?”
    3. Bargaining: “Maybe if I buy an indoor putting mat, it’ll feel like the real thing? Maybe?”
    4. Depression: “Is watching old Masters highlights at 2 AM healthy? Asking for a friend.”
    5. Acceptance: “Guess I’ll just work on my swing in the mirror until April. Or move to Florida.”

    The Snow-Covered Fairway Blues

    Somewhere out there, our favorite golf courses are suffering. Once lush fairways now sit buried under six inches of snow, tee boxes frozen solid, and bunkers transformed into icy death traps. A cruel joke, really—Mother Nature took our sand hazards and said, “Here, let me make this worse.”

    And yet, we dream. We dream of that first warm day when the snow finally melts, and the smell of spring fills the air. That first glorious tee shot—likely a slice after months of rust—will still feel like the best shot we’ve ever hit. Until then, we sit, bundled up indoors, questioning every life choice that led us to live somewhere that experiences seasons.

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    Indoor Golf: A Poor Substitute for the Real Thing

    Some of us turn to golf simulators to get our fix, stepping into an artificial paradise where every shot is met with a digital readout rather than a real-world outcome. Sure, it’s fun, but let’s be honest—it’s not the same.

    You know what’s missing? The smell of the grass. The feel of the wind. The guy in your foursome who takes five practice swings and still tops the ball 30 yards. Golf is a sensory experience, and no amount of indoor screens can truly replace the joy of walking down a sun-drenched fairway, feeling like you might break 80 today (but probably won’t).

    Desperate Times Call for Desperate Measures

    As winter drags on, golfers get creative. Maybe you’ve chipped foam balls in your living room, narrowly avoiding a disaster with the ceiling fan. Maybe you’ve tried putting into a coffee mug, pretending it’s the final hole at Augusta. Maybe you’ve looked longingly at your clubs, whispering, “Soon, my loves. Soon.”

    Whatever your coping mechanism, just know—you’re not alone. Golfers everywhere are suffering in silence, counting down the days until the courses reopen and we can finally, finally duff a wedge shot in real grass instead of on our living room carpet.

    Hope Springs Eternal (Eventually)

    Yes, winter is cruel. Yes, the storms will keep coming. But, fellow golfers, our time will come. The snow will melt, the courses will reopen, and we’ll once again complain about slow play and missed putts under the warm spring sun.

    Until then, keep your head down, keep your grip loose, and try not to lose your mind while waiting for golf season to return. And if all else fails—maybe it’s time to book that trip to Arizona or Florida. Just saying.

    Stay strong, my fellow golf-deprived souls. Warmer days are coming.

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